Sunday, August 16, 2009

Ken Goes to Vegas

Yesterday Scott and I went to the Prince William County Fair along with out neighbors Cathy, Brian and their little girl Emily. Emily is 4, and we rode all the rides together. We all spent too much money, ate too much food that's wasn't good for us, walked way too much and had a great time. My legs are feeling the burn this morning.

There is just so much I can do without being in unbearable pain but I refuse to lay down and die over it all. I've lost a lot of friends over the years and I plan on having much more fun before it's my time to go.

My Life: September 11 was a tragic day in America and it should never be forgotten. I know that all around the world people were touched in many different ways. That day gave me a freedom that I had not known for a long time.

Our lives were changing and Ken didn't know what he was going to do for a job. He asked me what I thought about moving to Las Vegas. Although I wanted to move there too, I told him that he should do it. I gave him encouragement to start a new life and not to have regrets for anything he didn't at least try. I explained that he could do it on his own and that I could find a nice little studio apartment and start over myself. He agreed and took a flight out to Vegas to look into where he would live.

I was so excited to be living by myself. My sister told me that her Yorkshire Terrier had puppies and as soon as they were old enough I could have one. It was going to be me and the new baby. Me and AA. Me and my sponsor Bob. Me and my therapist. Me, me, me, me, me!

Ken came back from Vegas and told me he had found a place to live. He said he would be moving on Oct 1st (my birthday). What a wonderful present for me. The first thing we had to do was sell everything. We had hired a couple of old ladies called Four Sales to run the estate sale. I would have preferred to do it myself but Ken insisted. Since it was his stuff, I gave in. The ladies overpriced everything and when the sale was over Ken had to rent a storage unit to put all that was left in it. I felt the sale was a flop. Hell, he even charged me to buy some things from him that I needed for my new place. Things likes pots and pans and a bed! He could be such a dick sometimes! What ever was left, I would sell for him and we would split the profits.

Before Ken moved I had found a studio apartment, moved my stuff in and went to Williamsburg to pick up my new little girl. My sister had 4 available puppies and they were all the size of small hamsters. One of them came wobbling up to me and she was beautiful! I gave her the name Princess Xena Sierra and would call her Xena. In the car on the way home, she cried. She was missing her mommy and it felt so sad. I knew she would be happy once we got to our new home.

My birthday came and Ken moved. I was a happy bachelor with the cutest dam dog you had ever seen. I took her everywhere I could. She went to AA meetings with me, the post office, long walks, and visits to friends.

On my own I volunteered my services as a bingo caller at the Girls and Boys Club on the weekends. I started dating again too. I was learning what happiness was all over again. I was slowly completing the 12 steps in AA and going to the meetings on a regular schedule. I was becoming what I hated when I first gave up drinking - HAPPY.

Time passed without arguments, insecurities, hate and irritability's. I healed more and more the next couple of years than I thought was imaginable. Then at an AA meeting I met Scott...

Love & Peace,


1 comment:

Angel said...

Hi Clayton,
I'm catching up on reading the blogs and they are great! I'll bet a lot of people would be surprised that what they are feeling re: stopping alcohol is a common reaction.
As sad as I feel that you hurt in so many ways for so long, these are the steps to prepare you to be a good friend to yourself and a GREAT partner for Scott. Once you started giving others your time, God gifted you with God's time.